tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-84532513354215302552011-04-21T15:03:43.974-07:00Chris_.noreply@blogger.comBlogger21100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8453251335421530255.post-76178140283697942232009-05-23T09:37:00.000-07:002009-05-28T23:07:03.398-07:00<p>If only I could stop being so utterly pathetic. I need some 'fire'. School may have ended but doesn't mean life has.</p><p>I am into someone new - though, like all my other infatuations; I stand from afar and admire from a distance - and only from a distance. Adequate for me to know you enough; erasing all my pre-conceptions about your supposedly claimed "egotistical nature".</p><p>Apart from the "flaky" persona, I decided to make a suit for my graduation. It is definitely a surprise to feel the impact of finishing high school. It's a good surprise. The fitting is today, hopefully it'll run smoothly. Nothing disasterous.</p><p></p><p></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/8453251335421530255-7617814028369794223?l=eternalsunshineonthelakehouse.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Chris_.noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8453251335421530255.post-62564952660827830252009-05-22T00:34:00.000-07:002009-05-23T09:36:57.931-07:00<p>School has ended. Definitely looking forward to a non-malignant life - without high school drama and gossip. High school is perfectly described to be a militarized zone or "jungle" as some might say. Personally, I am contented with the image of war.</p><p>It is an unbelievable sensation to have finished, though at the same time it feels unbearable - unbearable because of the flashing images in my mind; of the long gone memories that once, brought me blissful happiness. One of the humungous phases was experiencing the vissicitudes of like and love. I have to admit that admiration from a distance was always nice but painful - it was torture but pleasure; my "heart" always contradicting itself.</p><p><span style="color:#999999;"><span style="font-size:85%;">*Random spur*</span></span></p><p><span style="color:#999999;"><span style="font-size:85%;">I found you, I found your link - I read to know that you're still alive. I know it seems sad and maybe stalker-ish, but I can't help to be human and care. And just to let you know, during high school I was glad to have met you - and I will always remember 2005.</span></span></p><p><span style="color:#999999;"><span style="font-size:85%;">*Over*</span></span></p><p>It is over. School is over. I'm going to the airport soon with <span style="font-size:180%;"><span style="color:#3366ff;">Rauufah</span></span>. <span style="color:#cc0000;"><span style="font-size:180%;">Ayeshah</span></span> is leaving tonight to Singapore - I think this would be a good prepatory step for me to take - to ensure that it won't be as bad as the real thing. Slowly enduring the pain of leaving. It is coming - it is coming fast. I barely sleep during the nightime - it keeps me awake; the constant thought of leaving. In my mind, I am strong. I will not be broken - like a fragile crystal vase. Hold myself and pertain to my strength.</p><p>Pertaining to what is 'true' to me. Also, tonight I will be going to <span style="color:#009900;"><span style="font-size:180%;">Nicholas Klein</span></span>'s birthday party - using whatever optimistic will I have left, I will make sure that it will be fun. I am constantly in this dark state........I need to see the light.</p><p></p><p>-til' laters</p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/8453251335421530255-6256495266082783025?l=eternalsunshineonthelakehouse.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Chris_.noreply@blogger.com0